Series: Flowers in the Desert
Psalm 34:17 ESV
Psalm 34:17 The Message
There was a time in my life (pre-Seminary) when I identified the righteous as those who are right, or those who think in the right way.
Just like everything else in Seminary, I wasn’t even close.
When I was in my early fifties, God started nudging me about going to Seminary. I thought it was a crazy bad idea and I outlined to God all the reasons I should not go to Seminary.
It wasn’t because I hated school. I love going to school and I wanted to go to graduate school. In my head I was thinking about studying Anthropology. Since my undergraduate degree was in Communication I figured I would need to pick up classes in Anthropology before graduate school.
Mind you, I have no idea why I wanted to study Anthropology…I just thought cultural anthropology sounded different and interesting (I still do).
When God started whispering in my ear things about Seminary I knew what that would mean. A Masters in Anthropology is 30 hours and it is a two year program.
I’d been around Pastors all my adult life and I knew that Seminary was a much much greater commitment (and cost).
I looked it up.
I gasped!
A Master of Divinity is 144 hours and estimated years is 6-7.
Uhhhh…that’s a no.
I cried out to God and pleaded for mercy.
Psalm 34:17 tells us, “When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”
I’ve always found that having a scripture to back up my requests was important.
I pleaded with God, asking that my journey would not include Seminary. I outlined to God every reason Seminary was not a good idea. I know it was a stretch but I saw going to Seminary as being a “troubling” experience because of the time commitment and the cost.
As I prayed I became more and more uncomfortable. I wasn’t sure why I felt uncomfortable at the time, so I continued to pray that my journey would not include Seminary.
Then, God sent a wise person who recognized my attempt to avoid Seminary.
Basically he asked, “why are you trying so hard to avoid Seminary?”
I outlined my reasons. “It’s too costly. It’s too time consuming. It’s would involve a lot of travel. And…it’s too hard.”
The wise person smiled and said, “those are all things you can do. So, what’s the real reason?”
Since I wasn’t able to really answer that question, he advised me to ask God to show me what I’m afraid of and he reminded me I need to be really honest about it.
I took his advice and I spent quality time sitting with God. I asked God to show me why I was afraid.
The answer surprised me.
It turned out I wasn’t afraid of failing. Instead I was afraid I would succeed and it would change me.
Oh.
Once I knew the reason I was fighting it I was able to ask God to help me to deal with my fear.
Several several years after graduation from Seminary I can tell you that going to Seminary was one of the greatest journeys of my life. It did change me.
So I have to wonder about you.
Are you struggling with something you feel like God has set before you?
Have you prayed about it or are you doing what I did (running from it). You might be struggling about a relationship issue, or even about a friend who is sick.
Psalm 34:17 from The Message says, “Is anyone crying for help? God is listening,ready to rescue you.”
Maybe you need to take quality time and sit with God. Ask God to show you the way.
If you are facing a possible life changing event and you are afraid about what that will mean, surrender it to God.
Author Timothy Ferriss has written, “What we fear doing most is usually what we most need to do.”
Are you afraid of something?
Spiritual Practice: Pray and Listen
Ask God to show you why you are afraid.
Listen and wait for the answer.
In God, Deborah
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